Wednesday, October 22, 2014

Asking God for a sign...

Have you ever been at a place where you just kinda needed God to reassure you?  To let you know that He really does "have you?"  I had an amazing experience with God earlier this year.  I was going to post some before and after pics of our house and then I can came across these pictures and decided to share this instead.  

In October of 2013, Dan and I decided to put our house in Watertown on the market.  I clearly heard God telling me, "I've got this."  So we did.  And we trusted God "had it."  Kinda.  

We let doubt creep in.  
Our showings went down.
We lowered our price.
We had pretty much lost all hope. 

Dan needed to attend a training in California the week after Easter this past year.  He had just started a new job and was needing to attend a training.  He was going to California for 5 days and had asked if I wanted to go along.  We had never left the kids for that long.  The last time we went anywhere together, just us, was our honeymoon, 13 years ago. 
Since he had everything all booked already, I decided to tag along.  We had friends and family watch the kids and I used the money I made from selling some items on eBay to get a plane ticket.  

While we were there, Dan had to go to trainings every day...so it left me alone for quite a bit of time. I did some reading.  I did some walking on the beach.  I did some sun tanning.  One night I was looking at a tourist magazine and they had an advertisement for whale watching.  Whoa...whale watching?  Seriously, that is a real thing? Then it said that Tuesdays were half off days.  YAHOO!  The next day was Tuesday.  Now normally I am not that adventurous.  I like to do things with other people.  Going whale watching on my own was waaaayy out of my comfort zone.  Like Way out of it. 
I was so nervous I was going to miss my departure time that I arrived 2 hours early.  Whoops.  Good thing was I was able to get on the first boat of the morning instead. 

During my time on the whale watching boat, I did a lot of talking to God.  I stood at the bow of the boat (really wanting to act out titanic, but containing myself).  It was me and God and His amazing creation.  It was surreal.  Since we live in Wisconsin the landscaping in California is so different.  The houses built on hills.  The miles and miles of beaches.  The Huge homes.  I mean. Wowzers. 

So it is just me complaining talking to God about our home.  Why wasn't it selling?  Why did we feel so strongly to put it on the market and then nothing? Why? Why? Why?  
 Then the whale watching boat stopped.  Was I really gonna see a whale?  I thought my $20 ticket was just honestly gonna get me a boat ride, but it happened.  We saw a whale and her calf.  Well, this is what we saw.  Just the little hump.  We sat there and watched the whale come up about every 2 minutes.  The boat had to be far enough away so momma whale wouldn't freak out.
 To be honest, I was a little bummed.  That was it?  I was thinking like a huge whale and actually being up close.  Remember, I live in Wisconsin...I have only seen whales on TV!  Well, none the less, the whale watching company had a promise to show you a whale and I saw one.  Yes, it was awesome and cool...but I was still kinda feeling disappointed.  We had traveled too far North (or South, I don't remember) so I remember the boat had to turn around.  On the way back, I went back to praying.  This time I asked for God to give me a sign.  To show me that He really "had me."  Now I know we shouldn't doubt God.  I know He is in control.  But have ya ever been so confused and unsure that you ask God for a sign?  I hope I am not the only one that has done this.  So I boldly asked God to show me a dolphin.  Let me see a dolphin, God.  Just one.  That will surely be a sign to me that you do indeed know what is happening in my life.  (I know...I know...so full of doubt)

Within a minute or two of begging  asking God for a sign....I was SURROUNDED by dolphins.  Hundreds of them.  All over the place.  Jumping out of the water.  It was amazing.  It was unbelievable.  It was outstanding.
 I started crying.  I felt God's presence like I had never felt it before.
 You want to ask me to see A dolphin, my child?  Well, here's a couple hundred.  Boom.
 I was shaking and laughing and crying and so amazed by God's grace for me.  Here I was doubting that He "had" me....and he reminded me in that minute that He has more for me than just "having" me.  Yes, He "has" me, but He also loves me, He forgives me, He blesses me, He provides for me, He has underserving love for me.
I watched the dolphins surround the boat for 15 minutes.  They just swim along side of the boat....they are stimulated by it I guess.  I was so sad to have to go back into reality, but I was so filled up by what God had just done for me.

The next day our realtor called us.  We had a couple that was placing an offer on our home.  On the last day it was on the market.  God's hand was ALL over our home sale from the very beginning.  God worked miracles and moved mountains to get us into the farm house.

Then the boiler issues came up and once again I went to a place of doubt.  And once again, God has provided way beyond what I thought was ever doable.  We have almost reached our goal of $10,000 to get a new boiler.  I am so in awe of the people that have donated to us.  We are just so incredibly blessed and feel so loved.  People we know have donated.  People we don't know have donated.  Many have donated anonymously.  Local businesses are supporting us.  People have reached out to us.  To see this happen in our lives has forever changed us.  Just like the dolphins...God had this from the beginning.  Doubt will always creep in I am learning, but it is what I do with my thoughts and actions that will keep me from believing the lies.  Taking my thoughts captive.  Turning to the Bible.  Being held accountable by friends.  I have a feeling I will battle with doubt my whole life....but with God on my side and in my heart I am going to take comfort in that!

Today I am praising God for dolphins.  Today I am praising God for the outrageous and amazing number of people that have donated to our family.  Thank you, God, for "having" me....even when I doubt you!

1 comment:

  1. I don't think my first comment registered so I am re-entering it.
    OMG Susan! What a beautiful witness to God's Love for us! I truly believe that someday I will see a book by Susan Wilke...God is Good and I Have Proof! Thank you for sharing!!

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